Hm. Wikipedia estimates something like 1500 Islamically motivated suicide bombings since 1980… that would be 108.000 virgins… you think there ever WERE that many? Or isn’t that dead humans? If they ARE, is there a minimum age you need to have reached before you get recruited… or wait, is that really 72 PER martyr… or is there 72 that have to service all 1500? And anyway, do they STAY virgins? I mean, eternity is long, so after 2 1/2 months you sit there with 72 Non-virgins… what then? Can you be reincarnated to earn fresh ones?
Hey, no one ever said that the 72 virgins were female, or human for that matter. Imagine the look on the martyr’s face when they open the doors to paradise and see 72 curious virgin goats looking back at them!
What about Hitchen’s contention that the translation refers actually to 72 white raisins of crystal clarity, or some such thing?
Just try f*cking _that_.
fenchurch: No such thing. If you look at the context, it’s describing those “raisins” as extremely-white-skinned big-eyed full-breasted artificial beings. Now last time I’ve checked raisins don’t have skin, eyes or breasts.
Also even if you ignore that, it would be strange to only award you 72 raisins for all eternity. Now if they promised infinite raisins that’d be an argument but a finite amount of treats for an infinite amount of time?! A horrible deal and doesn’t fit with the other lavish, hedonistic descriptions of Jannah
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August 7, 2013
Poor virgins 🙁
Don’t worry, these are virgins without souls. A bit like realdolls I guess.
How many virgins do YOU know? Now, imagine 72 of them. Serves the buggers right, if you ask me !!!!!!
[…] Tirinha original publicada em 7 de julho de 2006 […]
Does that mean virgins are 72 times more likely to get into heaven than those who have fornicated?
Also, realdolls are creepy as hell.
Hm. Wikipedia estimates something like 1500 Islamically motivated suicide bombings since 1980… that would be 108.000 virgins… you think there ever WERE that many? Or isn’t that dead humans? If they ARE, is there a minimum age you need to have reached before you get recruited… or wait, is that really 72 PER martyr… or is there 72 that have to service all 1500? And anyway, do they STAY virgins? I mean, eternity is long, so after 2 1/2 months you sit there with 72 Non-virgins… what then? Can you be reincarnated to earn fresh ones?
Hey, no one ever said that the 72 virgins were female, or human for that matter. Imagine the look on the martyr’s face when they open the doors to paradise and see 72 curious virgin goats looking back at them!
…or 72 middle-aged men playing WoW.
everyone shares the virgins- budget cuts…
What about Hitchen’s contention that the translation refers actually to 72 white raisins of crystal clarity, or some such thing?
Just try f*cking _that_.
72? 1 would be more than I can handle, so I guess you need not worry about me!
Do muslims beliave in orginal sin? If they don’t then I know where those virgins come.
NES
@Richard-lol
@Author-LOLOLOL
Genius, honestly. My fave comic and honestly the best one out there.
And so TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jon-o: I prefer to imagine it as 72 virgin gay boar hogs.
fenchurch: No such thing. If you look at the context, it’s describing those “raisins” as extremely-white-skinned big-eyed full-breasted artificial beings. Now last time I’ve checked raisins don’t have skin, eyes or breasts.
Also even if you ignore that, it would be strange to only award you 72 raisins for all eternity. Now if they promised infinite raisins that’d be an argument but a finite amount of treats for an infinite amount of time?! A horrible deal and doesn’t fit with the other lavish, hedonistic descriptions of Jannah